Dear Secularists,

It’s me, Felicity….

You know..…..that unseen spirit that you want to be free to ignore? That’s me.

Don’t worry, I get it. I don’t want to force you to talk to me or admit that I’m real either. That’s just not how I am and I’m not going to hold it against you because you are free to think whatever you want and that’s how I want it to be…

…but I wanted to write you this letter because I’ve been wondering if you could perhaps at least…I don’t know, maybe admit that it’s possible for you to be hurting my feelings a little bit by ignoring me? You know…just in case I exist?

Relax, I’m not saying that I do, I’m just saying if I did, have you ever considered the fact that ignoring me might be, oh, I don’t know……………………………………………………….WRONG?

I know.

I know.

I know.

I said it. I shouldn’t have said it, but I said it so before you start getting offended, I need you to please hear me out because I am not trying to accuse you of being wrong……

……I’m trying to tell you that you are, as gently as possible……….which is different.

That’s it.

I’m just trying to do you a favor.

It’s like a toilet paper is stuck to your shoe type of thing. I don’t want to come right out and say it but I do want to get your mind thinking in the right direction so you can realize it for yourself.

I’m like a good friend who’s looking out for you and your shoe…that’s all.

Now I know that some of you might think that it’s impossible for you to have toilet paper stuck to your shoe because you’re agnostic but you can’t argue with the fact that everybody has to go to the bathroom so….. I don’t know. You either do or you don’t, and I just thought you should check…since it’s quite possible that you do.

It’s possible…..

……..for you to be wrong……

……..That’s all I’m trying to say…..

Which means you would be wrong to ignore me in public…you know, hypothetically, if I were to exist.

And that’s not to say that I think I should impose a belief in myself on any of you.

I don’t even think it’s possible for me to do that because I don’t even believe in myself. I’m just myself writing a letter to you …..there’s nothing you need to believe about that. It’s just what I’m doing.

And you don’t even have to read the letter if you don’t want to….

…..it’s just that you have toilet paper stuck to your shoe….

….and I wanted to tell you.

Warmly,

Felicity